


Bonus Points

by PoisonJack



Category: Borderlands, Tales from the Borderlands - Fandom
Genre: Dry Humping, Fainting, Fluff, Frottage, General au, Grinding, M/M, Neck Kissing, Rhys' creepy faboying comes to light haha, and i jizzed...in my pants, and jack loves it, does this count as police au? haha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-27
Updated: 2016-01-27
Packaged: 2018-05-16 16:05:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5831932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoisonJack/pseuds/PoisonJack
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The impossible happens and Rhys gets called up to Handsome Jack's office for what he thinks is a death sentence, and ends up fainting in his hero's office. He comes to on Jack's lap, and is pleasantly surprised for the actual reason he's there. </p>
<p>For the muse sentence prompts on tumblr. "You're under arrest"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bonus Points

**Author's Note:**

> You have the right to remain sexy. PFFFT AHAHAH

“You’re under arrest.”

“Excuse me?” Rhys looked up from the sandwich he was eating with Vaughn and into the face of one of Hyperion’s police force.

He’d finished an incredibly difficult coding issue and had been eating the celebratory meal in relative relief and peace. Vaughn had even offered to treat him to ice cream when they were done there.

“Did we do anything wrong?” Vaughn asked, which in retrospect was a stupid question, because no one working at Hyperion was squeaky clean.

“Not you, just him,” the man said as he was still looking at Rhys. Or at least, Rhys thought he was looking at him. It was hard to tell through the helmet.

“Uh….what did I do?”

“Please don’t make a scene, sir.”

Rhys gave Vaughn a fearful look as his mind ran through everything he’d recently done and what might have been found out. He rose on shaky legs before the man, and Vaughn stood as well.

“Not you. Just _him_ ,” the officer told Vaughn pointedly as the shorter man sat back down.

Vaughn met Rhys’ eyes as he was already activating his comm. “I’m calling Yvette.”

Rhys was stood from the benched seating and the man put his hand on his shoulder and directed him to walk in front of him.

He couldn’t think what he did recently that would get himself singled out with this level of commotion. Anything really bad, he would have expected more men. Anything smaller, he figured he’d just be summoned to someone’s office and begin the game of blackmail.

This man had a gun, personally making sure Rhys went where he was supposed to.

Oh god. He was gonna be killed. This was a hit. Why else would he need an escort? To keep him from running of course.

If Rhys was at all uncertain of the worst as he walked, shooting worried glances behind him, then he was absolutely positive of it and terrified as the man led him to the executive elevator.

“A-are you sure this isn’t a mistake?” he asked behind himself nervously. The man just cocked his gun in response and ordered him in.

Rhys was absolutely shaking the entire ride up. He knew where this elevator went. Of course he knew. He had more merchandise with Hyperion’s CEO on it than he liked to admit. And as much as he might have a little hero-worshiping crush on the man, he never once had an inkling to near Handsome Jack’s office unless he wanted to be personally strangled or airlocked.

Holy fucking shit, what had he done to earn the notice of this powerful man?

“ _Move_ ,” the gun-toting soldier gave him a shove with his gun, and Rhys stumbled on shaking legs out of the elevator. He turned behind him to look at the man, but he didn’t get off with him. “Move your ass. Through those doors. Don’t keep him waiting.”

Rhys was hyperventilating as he realized the man wasn’t leaving, and his only escape (aside from the airlock) was being held by the soldier. He turned, mind racing and legs quivering as he slowly progressed forward. Before he could knock on the doors to the CEO’s office, they opened automatically. He gave one last look back at the elevator, and the man patted his gun with meaning.

He felt like he was willingly walking towards his doom, and wasn’t certain if a bullet in the back wouldn’t be preferable to whatever awaited him in Handsome Jack’s office.

“Those long legs broken or something? Get in here!”

He heard the unmistakable booming voice of the CEO that made him jump, and the doors shut behind him. He was almost getting dizzy from fear, couldn’t think straight, and his heart was pounding hard in his ears. But he could definitely hear the footfalls that approached him, and definitely see the greatest, most fearsome man Hyperion had ever known.

Handsome Jack, all confidence and trademark grin, was striding over to him, gun on hip, eyes set with a determined look as he approached Rhys in a definitively predatory manner.

Rhys fainted.

When he came to, he was looking up at the ceiling, not immediately recognizing where he was. There was a thumb stroking his pulse point at his neck, and Handsome Jack’s face suddenly came into view.

“Theeeeere you are. Thought you’d keeled over. I mean shit, people have had heart attacks in my presence before but you’re not nearly that old, pumpkin. I’ve read your file.”

Rhys didn’t know what was happening, but his heart sped up.

“I was hoping for a bit of fun but not at this rate,” he said sorely. “I mean I _am_ all awe-inspiring but wow. Fainting?”

“….are you gonna kill me?”

Jack laughed at that. Rhys looked around a bit, realized he was laying on a couch in the office, head in Handsome Jack’s lap. He was using _Handsome freakin' Jack’s_ lap as a pillow. He must already be dead. This had to be a dream.

“I…thought I was going to be killed.”

“Why would I do that?”

“I was told I was under arrest.”

Jack worked through his laughter and took a breath with a smirk. “Just a little idea I thought would be funny as hell when I had them bring you up here. Didn’t know you’d nearly wet yourself. Please tell me you’re not one of those ‘faints from surprise’ types.”

Rhys just shook his head a bit dumbly. Okay, Handsome Jack wasn’t going to murder him, and he wasn’t in trouble. Why was he here? He asked as much.

“We keep track of Hyperion merchandise points, in case you didn’t know. You’ve bought a lot of shit with my face on it, pumpkin. I mean a LOT of shit holy friggin’ crap.”

“I…huh?”

“I check in on that stuff from time to time. It’s fun to see which one of you peons is leading. So, pretty thing like you obsessed with the big boss, huh?” His grin was toothy and amused, and Rhys’ cheeks heated just a bit as Jack’s warm fingers skirted over his throat. “Shit kitten, the points you’ve racked up should be able to be redeemed for a little fun with _The_ Handsome Jack, don’t you think?”

“I…I don’t understand.”

Hyperion’s greatest hero turned a charming grin on him and Rhys felt himself absolutely melt. The older man’s expression changed as he watched Rhys, and he traced a finger over his lips. The man in his lap was finally starting to get it.

“Want to have a little fun with the boss?” As Rhys’ eyes widened and cheeks heated, Jack just laughed. “Oh shit kitten, you are way too cute. Can you sit up?” Rhys was already crawling up even as he was nodding. “Don’t think we’re gonna attempt anything I had in mind _today_. You’ve got me interested enough to wait on that.”

He took Rhys’ chin in his hand and kissed him, and Rhys whined in confused pleasure as to how or why this was even happening. Jack begged entrance to Rhys’ mouth with his tongue and the younger man bloomed before him. Jack wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him against him, effectively making Rhys straddle him.

Rhys couldn’t keep track of all the noises he was making, the whines, the moans, but he most definitely checked every sound that came from the subject of almost every wet dream he’d ever had. The fact that he was touching Handsome Jack himself, hands on the man’s shoulders and getting well-acquainted with his taste was doing _everything_ for Rhys.

Jack had his hands on the younger man’s hips, anchoring him against him as Rhys' writhed in his grip. The older man bit his neck as he carded a hand through Rhys’ hair, and the younger man ground his hips down against Jack.

They were both hard. Rhys wasn’t at all surprised that he himself was. This was his every fantasy come true. But that Jack was hard, that he’d made that happen to Hyperion’s most powerful man…. Well, _there_ was a surprise.

Rhys ground down against Jack again as the older man drew his tongue along the top of Rhys’ own, and then he swore at the friction of their hips.

“Do that again, baby,” he told Rhys huskily. He did so without second thought, grinding and rubbing his clothed erection against the other man eliciting huffs of pleasure from Jack. “More…more just like that, princess.” Jack’s voice was breathy, deep, and Rhys was going to come in his pants, he knew it.

He ground into the older man now with understanding, wondering if he should attempt to give him a blowjob or at the very least a handjob when Jack suddenly gripped Rhys’ ass tightly with his hands and ground up against the younger man.

Rhys came in his pants with a choked sob, feeling far better than he had any right to for the mess he’d made of himself without even being touched. Jack bit him as his hips gave a final lurch, and then he sighed heavily before relaxing against the back of the couch, pulling Rhys with him.

Rhys couldn’t believe what had just happened, or that he was close enough to Handsome Jack himself to hear the man’s wildly beating heart. He’d just gotten off with _Handsome Jack_. He’d effectively gotten the legend himself off. Holy shit. Vaughn would never believe him.

Jack chuckled, the movement bouncing Rhys slightly. “You are something else, kiddo. This was fun. Messy, but fun.” Rhys picked himself up, and the relaxed grin the man was giving him nearly made his heart stop. “Clear your schedule tomorrow. I’m not done with you yet, but I’m not risking you passing out on me from sheer awe again today.” The goofy grin Rhys gave him made Jack quirk a brow. “Still think I want to kill you?”

“…not in the traditional way,” Rhys murmured, making Jack laugh hard.

“What else can that smart mouth of yours do?”

Rhys smirked. “I’ll show you tomorrow.”

**Author's Note:**

> This was a lot more fun to write than I care to admit. Posted and linked on my tumblr in the main list at the top :) http://purge-that-urge-rhackathon.tumblr.com


End file.
